January i brought on a large sum of who wanted me not to exist as my kind isn't well tolerated. i never ratted, nor will i.

i freaked out beyond my limits staying cool headed. sounds impossible though.

so i moved onto my own apartment. inner city near the lake. weekend of valentines day i hit the sand to see a red halo around a half moon reflecting the streams of the lake.

so i know i'm safe as long as i don't ever, even if it were free put cocaine in my damaged, useless arms again.

i've lost all my old friends. acting out upon that in the end i'm also responsible for what led into a broken, word to word proof of what i did.

i lost the USB cable for my camera. and is a good sign to save for a better one, learn the basics of how it's done and hopefully express what my damaged eyes see. not shakey camera shit or all that nonsense.

my apartment is above decent. i got a stove, bathtub, heating. HUGE difference from before.

i haven't seen anyone in person since november. my family are a bunch of insane people. my grandpappy is losin it. my aunt is the reason i'm chipped. it's nonsense. bullshit like that should not exist in anyones lives. PERSONAL PRIVACY is the notion of solitude.

i mean, in the film the machinst one of trevor's friends made a great point of that what use is a home if you can't relax in it.

my reality is blurring. i dunno what's next. hopefully some brain neuron will pop in my head while i sleep. no tragedy there it seems.